“I bet Jeff Francoeur has reached first base more than you” ROFL

watching this > watching the game…especially since I know the outcome from sabermetrics

Chase Utley is hot.

His wife really knows what she’s doing out there…

Jayson Werth punches babies for sport Im pretty sure. Soo…akward.

Hate to be the bearer of bad news:
these videos aren’t very funny

I appreciate the effort. Everyone has a different sense of humor. Anyone who is willing to be creative, work hard and put it out there should be thanked. Not saying you have to enjoy it, but at least appreciate the effort.

Someone broke the comments in the other thread. Someone also broke the Phillies will to fucking win.

you have a 1 in 73 chance of being involved in a violent crime in Philadelphia, you have a 1 in 52 chance of being involved in a violent crime in Atlanta. Stats usually go over Atlantians heads though so I’m not sure why I bother.

1 out. Big Piece on 2nd. Werth at the plate. Down by 6. The Phils have got the Cards right where they want them.

Shit’s getting fucked. Looks like Werth will be gone by Saturday now?

werthless and happ for oswalt

Greg Dobbs good looking?

@ bob: I don’t want to get rid of Happ though… because I want to say I was there when his hair peninsula finally became an island…then a barren sea. A sexy, barren sea*

*I totally dig it.

Some trade talk tonight from Buster and Jayson Stark (ESPN):

# Indications Phillies are working on major deal for starting pitcher & would move Jayson Werth in a companion trade. More to come on espn.com

Follow-up on Phillies tweet: Phillies have talked about lots of starters. But hearing they’ve spent a lot of time exploring an Oswalt deal.

# Jayson Stark and I hearing a whole lot about the Phillies working hard on a deal for a frontline pitcher. Don’t know for sure, but (more)

Oswalt fits in a lot of ways. They could make the dollars work by moving Jayson Werth’s contract — and they’d have Oswalt for 2011.

Some of the pitchers the Phillies weren’t talking about, as of early Tuesday evening: Ben Sheets, any of the Rays’ pitchers and Dan Haren.

I’m going to say that I’m not excited about getting rid of Happ in ANY deal. People complain about having lost Cliff Lee, and I’m just going to throw it out there. Happ is NOT Lee, but he’s going to be damn close as his career moves along. He’s a guy that we SHOULD most definitely keep. I’m hoping It’s Kendrick that got optioned down.

With that said, Halladay, Hamels, Oswalt is for sure a nice little start. Too bad Oswalt gets hurt for at least a quarter of the season every year.

Now, since I know that RAJ reads this blog everynight

GET RID OF BAEZ!!!!!! Please for the love of god and all that is good. Get him the fuck outta there and get Nelson back. Shit man. The guy sucks the hair on Kruks left nut.

Yeah I really hope Happ is not involved.

And it sounds like this MAY be dependent on whether Oswalt wants to play in Philly.

Ed Price:
If #Phillies are working on getting Roy Oswalt, sounds to me like they’d have to convince him that he will get them to the playoffs.

Source: #Astros “may be close to putting the ball in [Oswalt's] court” re: #Phillies trade. Oswalt has full no-trade clause.

@ John – It’s going to be a 3 team deal so the Ass-strokes can get some prospects. I’m seriously wondering who this 3rd team is that is going to get Werth though….

Why would a pitcher want to come to a team that fucks it’s starters on a daily basis. Just ask Cole

@John Matrix, Cole enjoys getting fucked. Maybe Oswalt does too?

I think Oswalt is nearly done with his career, so I’m not all about them signing him, either. Maybe throw Brett Myers in the deal, and I’ll start to get interested.

I’m just sayin’-I’m more against getting rid of Happ than I am about getting Oswalt or giving up Werth.

I’m with the general opinion, I want to see more of Happ before trading him away. He has been hurt his whole sophomore season though so there is no guarantee he will be good. It’s kind of a gamble trading him but it might turn out well.

Matt Gelb:
Happ will be rejoining the Phillies, Charlie said.

!!!!!!

MLBTraderumors.com :

10:17pm: Amaro tells Ken Rosenthal of FOX Sports that the Phils are “not close” to making a deal, though the team is talking to many other clubs on many fronts (Twitter link). The D’Backs, A’s and Astros all tell Rosenthal that they aren’t close to a deal.

Fuck yes @J!

If they were gonna get rid of Happ I was gonna shoot someone.

If this was earlier in the year and there was discussion of trading Werth I’d be furious, but he’s hitting less than .100 with RISP since May ?th(9th I think it said).

I am however against Francisco becoming the starter, call up Brown or John Mayberry Jr.

J.A. Happ shouldn’t be the wall preventing the Phils from getting Oswalt. He hasn’t even been able to get past the fifth inning once this year, in the majors or the minors. He doesn’t project any higher than a 3rd starter on an MLB staff, and most projections suggest that he’s a 4th or 5th starter.

The only untouchables in the Phils minor league system should be Brown, Cosart, and maybe Singleton. Otherwise, I’m completely fine with the Phils trading Werth and Happ OR any number of the Phillies prospects.

Bozo, no one else is hitting either. Werth isn’t the cancer ofthe lineup. For what ever reason the team has become pedro feliz

Oh, definitely John. I didn’t mean it like that.

maybe we can sign Oswalt to a 17 year deal

@ PhillyPhanInChi:

Does that offer include carnal relations?

who on earth would we get from the rays? seems they have their rotation/pen sealed tight

@Bozo

He’s been saying for the past month that he’s totally healthy. Plus, if his problems are all injury related, why is anybody excited that he’ll be coming back up? Given all of his struggles in the minors, I wouldn’t be surprised if he gets hit around worse than Kendrick.

I don’t think the sabermetrics fanatics are correct about everything, but I think they were right on during the Hamels/Happ debate last year. Happ was extremely lucky, and his strand rate and BABIP are not sustainable. If you’re looking for a 4th pitcher, he’ll fit the bill nicely, but let’s not pretend that a 4th starter should be the straw that breaks the camel’s back of a deal for a bonafide ace in Oswalt.

@66: http://deadspin.com/5592201/carl-crawford-takes-a-major-league-nutshot

@68 – You never close your eyes anymore.

Wow, now that is putting your money where your mouth is!

I don’t have a problem suggesting that he’ll be a 12-game winner. After all, it’s not all that hard to win 12 games in the majors, especially if he sticks around Philly where the offense will, I’m sure, eventually return to life (even if it doesn’t happen until 2011!).

The 3.50 ERA, though? I think that’s a stretch. 4.00-4.50 is more like it. Again, I could see him topping off as a 3, but realistically, we’re talking about a very good 4th starter here.

Roy Oswalt, on the other hand, is an ace. A-C-E. That would give the Phils a mighty three-headed pitching monster at the top of the rotation. J.A. Happ should not be what stops that from happening.

These Endless Debates are hilarious.

Get well, Jamie.

I’m playing RTTS on MLB 10 and I’m in year 2012. The Phillies traded J.A Happ(who was like 9-0 when he got traded) to the Cubs for Dempster. Last I looked Happ was 17-3 with an ERA around 2.20 towards the end of August. I want to punch the game so hard since the rotation consists of an aging Halladay with an ERA close to 4, Hamels with a losing record and a low 3′s ERA, Jeremy Guthrie with an ERA close to 8, and Dempster.

Not saying Happ will be that good in real life, I’ve just been bitching about the game and calling it stupid.

I would be 100% OK with the Phillies trading Werth to the Braves if it meant they also had to take Danys Baez.

Hah! I was just thinking about Don Carman and Shane Rawley tonight, when trying to see if I could come up with the 1988 Phils roster off the top of my head tonight. I got Rawley, but totally forgot about Carman.

Jesus, I’m practically illiterate tonight. How many “tonight”s can I put in one sentence?

I think the Oswalt deal’s the reality. Tampa has 2 of the top 5 prospects in baseball, 1 of those would net you Oswalt. The problem is that I won’t be happy with it simply because it’s Ed Wade, and if you’re going to deal with Ed Wade you need to completely fleece him. I want Oswalt and Myers and a right handed bat, I don’t want Happ to be included in the deal and I want Baez to be on Houston. With Ed Wade, this can be done.

I am fully aware that if Danys Baez leaves, he will become the next guy to absolutely kill the Phillies every time he sees them

Actually, here’s my dream trade:

Werth/Happ to the Rays for a top prospect and BJ Upton. Top prospect to Houston for Oswalt.

Upton starts in Right Field. He doesn’t hustle on a play and Danys Baez calls him on it. Upton kills Baez. Dom Brown called up. Upton in jail with Ugeth Urbina. Baez dead.

Win-Win

I still have a problem with Oswalt unless they know for sure he is 110% healthy after leaving the game earlier this week.

For what it’s worth, Oswalt insists he’s going to make his next start on Saturday.

Anybody wanna play Fifa online?

I’m reporting from my couch that the Phillies looked like shit again tonight.

Mike P, it wasn’t a case of the Phillies going “Well, we got what we needed from Happ,” it was a necessity once Moyer left the game to make sure that Happ is ready to go on Sunday. OR, he’s traded and the other team expects him to be ready to go.

you on Xbox or PS3 eric?

@ Mike – I concur about the short rest thing. Kendrick hasn’t had arm problems but they threw him in for garbage time against the Cubs and I’m sure it screwed him up. I’m still convinced that they threw him in there because they already knew he was going down and that whatever trade they thought was going to happen fell through.

Mike, in theory he would have been on pace if he went 8 innings. The logic, though, is that you don’t want him hurt. Moyer goes down, but then what happens if Happ goes and blows his arm out in the 4th inning of a AAA game? You make sure he’s healthy.

Seriously, fuck Jason Werth, fuck Drew Carpenter, fuck Ruben Amaro, fuck Charlie, fuck that second base bag that got Utley’s thumb injured, fuck me because a. I’m fat, and b. I pitch decent until I get hungry then pitch like the second coming of Adam Eaton/Turk Wendell, which happens once every fucking game I start, fuck Travis Lee because somehow this is his fault, fuck the Braves because they don’t stand a chance against any team in the AL, let alone the Cards, fuck Jamie Moyer for being old and somehow duping us into paying him, fuck the whole team for sucking every time Chris puts up a game thread, fuck Carlos Beltran just because, and fuck Pat Gilick for leaving us with RAJ.

yours truly,

Joe Blanton

Hahahahahahaah I love that you’re all miserable

I’m not miserable. In fact, I’m giddy.

The fact that you post on here between now and 4 a.m. (i.e., yesterday) means that you work a menial job with non-standard hours. You’re likely miserable with your lot, as if you could, you would return to your roots. But you’re neither intelligent enough to do so nor does your specialty give you that ability. Accordingly, you languish in the greater Philadelphia area, sitting in your small apartment, loathing work and probably life in general, and the only joy you get is through the Braves.

That, my friend, makes me happy.

Actually I love my job. My hours are 9-5 but I usually can’t sleep. The only thing that sucks about my job is that I’m stuck in this shit hole BUT before the end of the year I’ll be back in the ATL or in NYC. I have a girlfriend (Jersey girl not ugly fat Philly trash) and I’ve made some great friends up here who are Phillie’s fans unfortunatley . My apartment is small but it’s all I need & yes the Braves make me happy. Especially after sweeping the Phillies at Turner and then taking 2 of 3 from them at their own ballpark and pretty much clinching the division in July. Those assumptions you made were hilarious.

My friends who are Phillie’s fans are pretty much ready to jump off the Betsy Ross bridge and by reading comments on here and some on twitter I can’t help but be happy that you’re all miserable.

You want the Phillies to be 1st in the NL East but they arent and the Braves are.
You want them to be the best team in the NL but they aren’t the Braves are.
The Phillies are THREE games above .500 LOL.
The Braves are SEVENTEEN games above .500.

Everything is going their way. They’re dominating and Phillies fans are miserable.

Still not miserable, as I know you’re full of shit. It much be tough working the evening shift at Wawa, no?

If you ever need a shoulder to cry on, look me up here. We’ll talk through it.

Not upset at all. Baseball is a pastime. It’s entertainment. I prefer they win; I sleep tightly if they lose. There are many things in life in which one becomes emotionally invested. Sports, I think, shouldn’t be one of them. Sure, the Phils could be doing better this season. But because they’re not, I’m not losing any salary, my family isn’t becoming ill, and so on.

By the way, it’s Phillies’, not Phillie’s. I know grammar is not a prerequisite to scanning my cups of cheese cubes and pepperoni, but you should work on it.

And finally, if you’re wearing your Prado jersey, I also suspect you’ll be wearing your mitt. Nothing says “I’ve made it!” more than a grown man at a baseball game in a jersey and wearing a mitt. You’re so cute.

and don’t try to give me that nice area of Jersey bull shit, they don’t let southerners in there.

WTF is Fishtown? I consider Cherry Hill a nice area…I don’t know about you.
I wasn’t trying to validate anything. Just stating facts.
Philly fan in Chicago? Did you go to the games this week? Didn’t watch but according to my friends they were miserable (what else is new?)

I EAT COCK!

What are the readers gut feelings towards when this trade will be finalized? Will Moyer going down last night delay this process? I’m excited for a shakeup because, at this point, it’s definitive that it needs to happen. Maybe Charlie should announce he’s going to retire at the end of the season too, lol.

@Scott

If he’s going to blow out his arm in the 4th inning of an appearance at AAA, he’s going to blow it out during his first outing in Philly. You mightaswell know if it’s going to fall off before he gets back to the show. Sure, there could be some sort of freak accident that leads to injury, but at a certain point, if you’re worried about that, why pitch him for 3 innings at all? A 3 IP appearance doesn’t tell the organization anything it didn’t know before, and it risks further injury. My point is that if you’re going to pitch him for 3 innings, you mightaswell give him a full appearance and see what he’s got, because he still hasn’t demonstrated the ability to get through 6 or 7 innings.

perhaps this was already discussed but according to buster on mike & mike this morning the phils are working on oswalt for non-domo prospects and werth to tampa bay (also for prospects).

so we’ll probably end up with ben sheets and the A’s 4th outfielder.

Braves2010NLChampions with a slipup there?

Hold on… Is there a chance we can still work something out for Cliff Lee?

and the phillies outfield will be filled with 4th outfielders.

THEY TOOK MY JERRRBBB

good shit

These are absolutely hilarious.