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Posts Tagged ‘Pat Burrell’

Oct
28
2010
Posted by at 11:57 am ET 141 Comments

A few days ago, dong-shot specialists Deadspin ran a video of Giants closer Brian Wilson doing an appearance with Chris Rose on his Fox Sports show Cheap Seats via satellite from his house when a man wearing a gimp outfit casually walked behind him mid-interview. Then later on, during a post-victory NLCS locker room celebration, Rose once again interviewed Wilson, but this time he referred to the leather-clad fella who mysteriously showed up at his house as “The Machine.”

Here’s some video to fill you in (wait until the :43 second mark):

So Deadspin asked, who is The Machine?

After narrowing down the suspects, they decided that the culprit was more than likely Pat Burrell, former left-fielder for the Philadelphia Phillies and Wilson’s current teammate. Now that’s some mighty fine investigative work by the Deadspin boys, because for the last couple of years, I have been sitting on a picture of Pat Burrell in all his gimp-outiftted glory, but never ran it because the guy who gave me the picture didn’t want to get caught.

Well, that was a few years ago when Pat Burrell was a Phillie, and since he’s now with the SF Giants, and it’s basically public knowledge anyway, I’m gonna go ahead and share the picture with everyone…

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Oct
22
2010
Posted by at 9:17 am ET 60 Comments

One of the more entertaining subplots to last night’s 4-2 THRILLER in San Francisco was the verbal spat that occurred after Roy Halladay struck Pat Burrell out to end of the first inning.

It was during the bottom half of the first and the Giants had already taken a 1-0 lead on a fielding gaffe by Chase Utley when Pat stood in against our horse with Buster Posey on first base and two down. Roy made quick work of Burrell, and struck him out looking with a nasty cutter on the inside half of the plate to retire the side and minimize the damage. But Pat was obviously perturbed, and so he took exception to homeplate umpire Jeff Nelson’s called strike three by telling him about it as the Phillies headed back to their dugout.

Well, Roy Halladay was none too please and stared down Burrell the whole time. That’s when Pat decided to not-so-politely ask Roy what he was looking at. (.gif’d by @dhm):

Possibly motivated the rest of the way by pure Giants hatred, Roy not only stayed in the game nursing a sore groin, but dominated those Frisco hitters with quite possibly his worst stuff of the season.

LESSON A: DON’T MAKE ROY ANGRY.

And that stare is just menacing, folks:

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Oct
15
2010
Posted by at 2:17 pm ET 53 Comments

(Simpler times, when Pat Burrell would show young boy scouts his wood. GETTY IMAGES!)

DECEIVING HEADLINE!

It is true though. Pat Burrell’s San Francisco Giants teammates asked the former Phillies LF for some advice to give the family members who DARE come to Philadelphia to cheer on their father/husband/sibling/cousin at CBP this weekend (via some magazine that used to be relevant when I was younger*:

“Go tell your family to buy an Utley jersey. Don’t wear ours.”

Although it is good advice to wear an Utley jersey like it’s camouflage when attending a game in Philly, Pat should also warn them that practically everyone knows the opposing team’s family members sit in Section 126 and will be easily recognizable Utley jersey or no Utley jersey.

Oh, and Pat, PREPARE TO BE BOOED.

*I don’t hold any grudges or anything

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Aug
18
2010
Posted by at 12:16 am ET 164 Comments

Roy Oswalt and Carlos Ruiz helped spoil Pat Burrell’s return to Citizens Bank Park, as the Phils used 13 hits to drop the San Francisco Giants in the first game of the series to take sole possession of first place in the National League Wild Card.

After a nice ovation from the sold out crowd, Burrell promptly blasted a solo homer to give the Giants a 2-0 lead in the first, which would be the high point of his evening, as starter Barry Zito would give up four runs over five innings in the loss.

Jimmy Rollins started the scoring for the Phils with a two out, two run single in the fifth, followed by two more on the strength of a two run double from Shane Victorino an inning later to give the Phillies the lead.

They piled on five more in the bottom of the eighth, with the big hit coming from Carlos Ruiz, who lined a bases loaded double to put them up by three.

With this win, the Phils seized first place atop the National League Wild Card – their first sole possession of first place since May 29th, when they lead their division.

They’ll look to expand their lead on Wednesday, when Joe Blanton (4-6, 5.69) takes on Matt Cain (9-9, 3.11).

Roy Oswalt (W, 8-13) allowed three runs on six hits in seven innings, while striking out seven.

Jimmy Rollins went 2 for 5 with a run and three RBIs.

Placido Polanco went 4 for 5 with a run.

Jayson Werth went 1 for 4 with a double (39) and a run.

Shane Victorino went 2 for 4 with a double (18), a stolen base (23) and two RBIs.

Mike Sweeney went 1 for 3 with a run.

Carlos Ruiz went 1 for 3 with a double (20) and two RBIs.

Barry Zito (L, 8-7) allowed four runs on eights in five innings. He walked one and didn’t strike out a batter.

Pat Burrell went 1 for 4 with a homer (11) and an RBI.

Jose Guillen went 2 for 4 with a homer (1) and an RBI.

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Nude, Wet Pat Burrell Once Rescued Aubrey Huff from Doldrums*: In what might just be the greatest newspaper article written this year, Andrew Baggerly of the Mercury News found out that the reason Giants 1B/LF/RF Aubrey Huff is the man/ballplayer he is today is because of one Patrick Brian Burrell. You see, when they were teammates at The U in college, Huff was a shy fellow who was thinking of leaving school. Then this happened: “[My mom]‘s in my room one night and I’m sitting on my bed and she’s telling me to give [Miami University] another two weeks. Anyway, there’s a knock on the door, and before I can even get off the bed, Pat comes barging in with a six-pack in his hand, dripping wet, buck naked. So I jumped up and shut the door. Coming from Texas, these things didn’t happen. I said, ‘See what I’m dealing with here, Mom? She just started laughing and said, ‘Actually, Aubrey, that’s pretty darn funny.’ I thought, ‘My God, if my mom can laugh at this, why can’t I?’” Read the rest of it, sucker [Mercury News]

*bolded headline-thing ripped straight from Walkoff Walk because it was so good

Pat Burrell is currently FOURTH in the All-Star game voting for American League DH. He is only 244,068 votes behind Vladimir Guerrero, the leader in that particular category. PLEASE VOTE PAT BURRELL [VPB2010]

Mar
08
2010
Posted by at 9:01 am ET 45 Comments

It has been over a year since Pat Burrell was signed away from us by the Rays, and after a disappointing first season with his new club, fans down in the Tampa/St. Pete area don’t seem too thrilled about having him back for his second season as DH.

Well guess what, Tampa/St. Pete? The feeling’s mutual:

“I don’t know if there is any way of saying this without getting myself in trouble, but there is definitely a different excitement level [in Philadelphia]. I think more than anything, there is a stronger tradition for baseball there. That goes without saying.”

In other words, Pat’s trying to say that Tampa fans are gimmicky bandwagoneers who couldn’t care less about baseball, nor do they understand the game particularly well. As a matter of fact, it is a such a generally understood or accepted notion, that you don’t even have to say it aloud.

Pat wasn’t done though,

“You talk to a lot of players and certain players don’t like to play in Philly, certain guys love it and I was one of the guys that really enjoyed it. I probably saw the full parameter of the good and the bad. But at all times you knew that people cared. They want you to win and they come out and support you. I’m not sure enough players appreciate that because there aren’t many places like it. You have Chicago, New York, and places like that, but I think it’s the minority.”

Even more impressive than Pat’s correct usage of the word parameter is the fact that Pat still feels that way about a city who — let’s be honest — treated him pretty harsh for being a such a productive player over the course of nine years. Surely the World Series title in ’08 helped his perception, but Pat Burrell can relate to the Philadelphia fan (especially the women) better than a good 90% of the athletes that pass through town.

And I don’t know about you, but if the Phillies are in the market for a right handed bat off the bench for the stretch run, and the Rays were willing to eat a majority of his salary (and by majority, I mean all), I couldn’t think of a more exciting mid-season acquisition than Pat the Bat.

I’m fairly certain it has no chance of happening, but it sure does sound good.

Pat Burrell misses Phillies | Inquirer

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Mar
03
2010
Posted by at 1:43 pm ET 63 Comments

Before Pat Burrell was a #1 draft pick for the Phillies back in the ’98 amateur draft, he was breaking records and winning Golden Spikes and College World Series MVP awards for the University of Miami. Then in 2008, 10 years after his college career ended, Pat was honored for his collegiate efforts by being inducted into the prestigious sports hall of fame located down there in Coral Gables, Florida. 

So why am I bringing all this up now?  I’m glad you asked.

The fine folks who man the umsportshalloffame YouTube account have been tirelessly uploading various intro videos and induction speeches from years past.  Lucky for us, one of the players they just added was Pat Burrell.

First up is his introduction video, and after the jump you can check out his speech.  I have to warn you though, the University of Miami’s sound engineers didn’t too such a good job with the volume, so you’ll more than likely have to turn it all the way up then place your ear to the speakers. 

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