The Fightins'
Lenny Dykstra Is A Cot Damn Quote Machine
Posted by at 10:29 am ET 7 Comments

Lenny Dykstra was in court yesterday for something that I don’t quite understand involving an accounting firm that claimed was owed upwards of $138,000 from the former All-Star centerfielder. That’s obviously not what’s important here.

Before, during, and after the proceedings, Nails was a non-stop supply of entertaining quotes. Here’s a sampling (via NBC10):

When questioned about the allegations from Halcyon Jets that he bounced a $7,000 check earlier this month, sayeth The Dude:

“That’s my fuckin’ ashtray money, bro, I don’t even know if I flew on their plane.”

Assuming a member of the NY Post didn’t necessarily believe that Lenny was a rich man, he reiterated:

“See that purple label, bro? (pointing to the inside of his suit jacket) That’s seven large”

And what about his half-crazy antics and demeanor?

“I like to pretend I got hit by a lot of pitches.”

He also lamented the sight of a hunched-over elderly woman crossing the street.

“See that? I’m going to be walking like that. I crashed into too many walls.”

Finally, here’s what he said about the company suing him, DDK & Co.:

“They folded like Mitch Williams in the ninth. There was no case. There was nothing.”

Never change, Leonard. Never change.

Lenny Dykstra – Classy After All These Years | NBC10
Ex-Met Lenny Dykstra settles bill with accountants, then runs mouth | NY Daily News

  • Big Stevie

    fucking hilarious

  • Reverend Paul Revere

    by ashtray i think he meant twizzler: twizzler money

  • Melissa

    God he is so crazyyy it is almost incredibly endearing, I can’t lie.

  • The Phunyun

    I blame him for the impending depression our economy is about to go into. I’m not exactly sure why, but if Jim Cramer is calling The Dude a “genius” when it comes to stocks you know the system is fucked up.

  • Terry Funk

    Are you supposed to ash the Twizzler like that?

  • bigmyc

    Sigh…Although it’s true that Lenny looks more like a “Larry” now, (no offense to Mr. Andersen or any other Phils’ fans who might carry that name), he is still the “Dude.” Even if it’s more along the lines of, “that wierd dude who hangs out in high school parking lots looking for crazy young trim yet is still a bit interesting simply because he has a sweet car.”

  • KGB

    Will “That’s ashtray money, bro,” soon replace “Don’t tase me, bro,” in the nation’s conciousness?

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