Hey, guess what? The Phillies bullpen sucks, that’s what.
But I’m sure you didn’t need me to tell you that. Through twenty-six games so far this year, the pen (collectively) has a gaudy 4.46 ERA with 4 blown saves. As a matter of fact, the only two guys who have been worth a damn are Chad Durbin (12.1 IP, 2.19 ERA, 0 HR allowed, 9K, 5 BB) and Jose Contreras (7.2 IP, 1.17 ERA, 1 HR allowed, 14 K, 0 BB), but the rest of them? Garbage.
The worst of the bunch — BY FAR — has been Danys Baez. Let’s put it this way — In 10 IP in 2010, Danys has given up 9 earned runs; in 49 IP, Roy Halladay has given up 8. Now, I guess you could use that stat to point out how good Roy has been, but for the purposes of this post I want it to exemplify how sucky Baez has been.
Okay, now here’s the important question: Why have they been this bad? Is it some bad luck BABIP maneuver that will eventually even itself out? Is it a case of the dreaded “noodle arm?” Is it because they do dumb shit like kick a metal chair when they get aggravated?
Perhaps some of that plays into their suckage, but reader Chris Hoffman may have found a simpler reason:
I was out in Arizona last weekend for a couple of games and sat by the bullpen for one of them. I think I figured out the cause of the struggles they’ve been having. Check out the pictures, I think the team needs a new nutritionist.
You heard the man, check out the pictures.
A closer look:
DEAR LORD, THAT’S AN ENTIRE COOLER BAG FILLED WITH CANDY!
If they’re not giving up runs, they’re gorging themselves with Nestle Crunch bars!
Now that I think about it, that’s probably the reason DJ Fatty Fat waddled out near the bullpen last night. He probably sniffed out their stash from Section 135. Now whip yourselves into shape, bullpen! Because at this rate, you’ll all be a bunch of Dennys Reyes’ by year’s end.
- 700 Level
- Crashburn Alley
- High Cheese
- House That Glanville Built
- Philadelphia Will Do
- Philled In
- Philly Gameday
- Philly Gossip
- Phoul Ballz
- The Good Phight
- The Insider
- The Zo Zone
- Where's Weems?
- Who Does He Play For?
- Zoo With Roy